Wisdom


“Time is a sort of river of passing events, and strong is its current; no sooner is a thing brought to site than it is swept by and another takes its place, and this too will be swept away.”

Marcus Aurelius

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The Chinese people say that we can never step in the same river twice. I believe this is so true because even if we meet the same people and even when we encounter similar circumstances in our lives, it is different every time.

Why?

Because each one of us is changing and evolving constantly. This is a good thing. This is how we grow. If it were not, we would still be living in caves and caverns.


It is difficult, however, for people who insist on resisting change. Resisting change is simply a display of our fears. It makes us very uncomfortable and very worried about the unknown.

   

 

“What you leave behind is not what is engraved in stone monuments, but what is woven into the lives of others.”

Pericles

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Wow!  I like this quote from Pericles.

It reminded me of what was woven into my own life.

The person who had the most influence on my of thinking has passed away in 1912.

How did he influence me?

With a great book that he had published in 1902-03.

This book that he left is his legacy to the world. Millions of people have been influenced by this masterpiece and still are today.

The title of the book is: As_a_Man_Thinketh . It is available for free on the web at many places.

It is now in the public domain within the United States and most other countries. It was released the 1st of October 2003 as a Project Gutenberg eText edition

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The mystery litterary Man: James_Allen_(author)

This book is one of the shortest I ever read, one of the easiest to understand, and yet, one of the hardest to put into practice.

I have read this book dozens of time and plan to read it over and over again.

Why will I read it again and again? Because even if I understand it very well, I still don’t apply many of its principles.

I recommend  this book to you very much. To read with absolutely no distraction or noise…

“Start living now. Stop saving the good china for that special occasion. Stop withholding your love until that special person materializes. Every day you are alive is a special occasion. Every minute, every breath, is a gift” 

Mary Manin Morrissey

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It seems to me that Natasha Richardson had almost everything going for herself. She seemed to be happily married to Northern Irish actor Liam Neeson. She had two sons. She came from a famous British family of actors and actresses. I assume that she was financially wealthy. She left this world unexpectedly at the age of 45 (16747 days).

On 16 March 2009,  Natasha Richardson sustained a head injury when she fell while taking a skiing lesson at the Mont Tremblant Resort in Quebec, about 130 kilometres (81 mi) from Montreal. The injury was followed by a lucid interval, when Richardson seemed to be fine and was able to talk and act normally. Paramedics and an ambulance which initially responded to the accident were told they were not needed and left. Refusing medical attention, she returned to her hotel room and about three hours later was taken to a local hospital in Sainte-Agathe-des-Monts after complaining of a headache. She was transferred from there by ambulance to Hôpital du Sacré-Cœur, Montreal, in critical condition and was admitted about seven hours after the fall. The following day she was flown to Lenox Hill Hospital in New York City, where she died on 18 March. An autopsy conducted by the New York City Medical Examiners Office on 19 March revealed the cause of death was an “epidural hematoma due to blunt impact to the head”, and her death was ruled an accident.

Source Wikipedia, January 14, 2011

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It reminds me of an incident that happened to me on October 1 st 2005. I was coaching at the hockey school. I wasn’t wearing my helmet that morning… I fell on the ice and hit my head really hard. My wife was sitting on the bench and heard the sound of my head hitting the ice. (do you remember how noisy it is at the arena?) I didn’t hear a thing but I sure felt it. I was completely dizzy. It took me a good 30 minutes to start feeling normal again. When I read Natasha’s story, it makes me realize that what happened to her could have happened to me.  I am so thankful that my life was spared that day.  

This is another reason why I try to live each day like it’s the last.

Does this make you realize how fragile your life really is?

If your answer is YES…

Start living now!

It’s not too late for new year’s resolutions!

But…

Some people don’t like new year’s resolutions because they don’t think it works for them.

It’s not a reason to neglect taking a close and honest look at your life.

Socrates said many years ago “A life unexamined is not worth living”  

 

 

Well, why is it that so many people don’t take the time to quiet their minds and take a look at their lives?

Why don’t they  ask themselves some important questions like;

Who am I? 

What do I want to do with my life? 

What are my natural talents or skills?       

What makes me happy or unhappy?         

What am I afraid of and why?    

Why do I think I’m too old or too young?                 

Who do I like to spend time with?              

What can I do to improve my circumstances? 

Do I have a tendency to blame others for my own failures or limitations?

You don’t have to call it a new year’s resolution. But you can still make some changes or improvements.

The real question is:  What will I do in 2011 to make a difference in my life?

It seems to me that we are stubborn students of life.

Life seems to tell us; here is a situation you need to face for your own developpement, and yet, most of the time, we will try to avoid the lesson. Why? Because it’s too damned hard! The curious thing about this is: the lesson we try to avoid seems to come back to us in many unexpected ways. Somehow, we can’t escape it. We have to meet the challenge.

An example?

I know some people (actually quite a lot of them) who move from relationship to relationship only to discover after a while the same problems they were experiencing in the previous relationship. It seems to me that what they are trying to avoid comes back to them in another form and with a new label.

Personally, I start too many new projects and I don’t finish all of them. I know it, I’m aware of this but somehow, it doesn’t seem  to change. I have to admit I can’t do  it alone. When I face this kind of situation, I try to find a coach, a mentor or a personal trainer to make sure I am accountable to someone.

When we focus on the moment and accept to face what we have to, it can be difficult, but it is one of the best ways to grow, to outgrow the challenge.

What does this post have to do with time?

If we do what WE MUST do when WE HAVE TO do it, the day will come when we will do what WE WANT to do WHEN WE WANT TO do it.

The sooner we understand this concept and we put it in practice, the more time we will save to do other activities that we really enjoy.

Will you try it?

“What a wonderful life I had! I only wish I’d realized it sooner”

Colette

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Life is not always easy! Sometimes, life throws a curve at us and we have a hard time dealing with it.

This is why it’s important to remember our blessings, especially when things don’t go our way. Because, most of the time, even when things are not as good as we’d like, there is still a lot going well. It’s important to take the time to be thankful EVERYDAY for the good things in our lives.

In 1985, I had a car accident and I was immobilized without being able to walk for about 6 weeks, then after I had to go to physiotherapy for a couple of months. That was the bad side of the accident. The good side of it is that for the first time in  my young life, I took the time to read good books and spent time all alone away from the distractions of the world.Time to ponder upon what I was going to do with my life.

This was the beginning of a process of introspection that lead me to question constantly what I was going to do at almost every moment of my life. As Socrates once said, “A life not examined is not worth living”,  from now on, I would question myself and question others continuously. I would start to doubt common beliefs and confront them. it was not because everyone said something that it was necessarily true.

As we question ourselves and others, it is tempting to become sarcastic, but this is when it’s important to take a long-term perspective and realize that something bad in the short term might turn out to be a good thing in the long run. Many curses are opportunities in disguise. It’s up to us to learn how to recognize them.

Everyday we must look at the good things in our lives even when everything seems to be hopeless.

Everyday we must count our blessings and try to minimize our sorrows.

This is one of the ways to appreciate how wonderful life really is.

Will you count your blessings today?

Some of us live under the influence of alcohol.

The influence is good as long as we are under the influence. The next morning, the influence can be quite different.

Some of us live under the influence of shopping, and the influence is good until as we receive the credit card statement…

Some of us live under the influence of gambling, and the influence is good until as we realize that the house wins most of the time.

Some of us live under the influence of buying expensive toys to impress others who don’t care at all. This influence is gone when we realize that we become a slave of this habit.

Some of us are under the influence of a new religion, and the influence seems to disappear when that special God of ours doesn’t answer our requests.

Some of us indulge in sexual escapism, and the influence is gone when the temporary thrill is over.

Some of us will study philosophy and believe that they have found the Way, only to wake up later and realize that their particular philosophy can fail them.

Some of us will swear by the world of reason and science, only to discover the actual limitations of our understanding. At least at this point in our evolution.

Some of us will invest in the joy of parenthood only to realize later that our kids will be entitled to their own lives.

Some of us will want to earn a lot of money until they realize that money can’t buy love.

And while most of us live under one kind of influence or another, Time goes by.

Under what influence are you living ?

Is this the kind of influence that you enjoy?

It’s up to you!

 I think it is good to be “Voracious”.

“Voracious” means to be very greedy or eager in some desire or pursuit.

The intensity of your desire will determine how long it takes for you to reach your goal. When it comes to reading, writing, respecting some deadlines, exercising, traveling, learning new skills, and meeting new and different people, I consider myself to be extremely “Voracious”.

What is good about being “Voracious” it that it saves a lot of time.When we enjoy doing an activity, it takes a lot less energy. That is why it is so important to invest more time on our natural strengths. On the other hand, we can delegate or eliminate what we don’t like to do.

This is the way to keep our level of voraciousness extremely high.

Do you consider yourself “Voracious” ?

I was walking on the 103rd floor of the tallest building in the United States

and suddenly, I chickened out…

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In October 2009, I visited the Willis Tower ( formerly Sears Tower) in Chicago. When I reached the top floor, I noticed some glass balconies that were suspended outside the building. The all-glass boxes allow visitors to look through the floor to the street 1,353 feet below. The boxes, which can bear five  tons of weight, extend approximately four feet over Wacker Drive from the 103rd floor.

It is a very interesting experience to look down at the cars when we feel like we’re walking on thin air.

As I entered one of the balconies, I walked right in it and I wasn’t able to stay in the box more than 30 seconds. Beside me, there was a child of 3 years playing in the box without a worry in the world. The boy played in the box for at least a good 10-15 minutes.

I suddenly realized how fearful I had become as an adult compared to this little child. I knew the boxes were very solid, but I didn’t trust it enough to stay longer than 30 seconds. 30 very long seconds.

Was it the structure of the box or myself I didn’t trust?

I was humbled by the innocence and the complete trust of a child.

How many times in your life do you avoid doing something because you don’t trust yourself? 

Because you’re afraid…

or you don’t finish what you start…because… because… because.

Do one thing EVERYDAY that scares you!!!!!!

 

Turn your weakness into a strength!

One of the most inspirational stories ever told is the story of Dumbo the Elephant. Throughout most of his young life, Dumbo was persecuted for having big ears. As a result, he hated his ears because they always brought him down. One day, however, he falls from an airplane, but then something amazing happens. Dumbo begins to flap his ears, and he can fly! The very things that had brought Dumbo down his whole life are now lifting him up.

A good book that explains how to turn your negatives to your advantage is…..

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How many times in your life did someone make fun of you only to realize later on that it was actually your strength??????

How many times did someone criticize you for doing something good????

How many times did you feel guilty because of other people’s personal beliefs?

How can you learn to turn your “weakness into a strength”?

Next time you feel this way, try to remember Dumbo.

 

 

“I have a new philosophy. I’m only going to dread one day at the time.”

Charles Schulz, Peanuts, cartoon

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A while ago, a lady went to a restaurant in downtown Montreal to celebrate her birthday with her husband , as they entered the restaurant, apparently they asked the hostess for a seat near the window to get access to a better view…

This is an excerpt of the Montreal Gazette July 17, 2009

“MONTREAL – One minute Thursday night, a couple was quietly celebrating a birthday inside the Mikasa Sushi Bar on Peel St.; the next minute, a concrete slab crashed through the glass skylight above them, killing the 33-year-old woman instantly.

Her husband of two years, also 33, lay next to her lifeless body screaming, “Ma femme! Ma femme! Stay with me!”

He pleaded for help, but other diners and staff were paralyzed with shock. Minutes later, sobbing and screaming, the man was loaded into an ambulance, his right hand wrapped in a blood-soaked napkin, two single tracks of blood running down his cheek.

“Her birthday was Monday, that’s what they were celebrating,” said the nurse, who spoke on condition that her name not be published. The concrete panel from the 18th floor of the Marriott Residence Inn crashed through the sloping glass ceiling of the restaurant, which lies directly below at street level, and hit the woman “directly” – while she was seated at her table, said Montreal police Constable Olivier Lapointe.”

The last thing this couple was expecting on that evening was a piece of concrete to fall on the woman’s head…  33 years old.   (12 045 days)

The reason why I bring up this story today is to show that when we have regrets about the past or worries about the future, we waste precious time and energy. We must focus on the present.

This is where our attention should be because this is where we have a little more control over what happens to us. This lady didn’t have much control over what happened to her that night.

Today, try to focus your attention on what you can influence and the rest will take care of itself.

I agree with the creator of Peanuts; we should only “dread one day at a time”

How many days to you “dread” in advance?

“Instead of concerning ourselves with what will come tomorrow, we should be thankful for what we have today, which is good health for most of us, a roof over our heads, food to fill our stomachs and free time to enjoy with our family and friends. This does not mean that we should not plan for tomorrow. It just means that we should not let it control us to the point where it takes us away from what we are able to do today.”

Stephen Lafond

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“Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils”

Hector Berlioz (1803-1869) French composer

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Time is a great teacher when we dare to make mistakes.

Time is a greater and more effective teacher when we accept to learn from our mistakes.

Time is the greatest and wisest teacher when we learn from the mistakes of others and avoid to make them ourselves.

Time will eventually kill all of us, and since we don’t know when, one of the most important lessons Time can teach us is:  To live each day to the fullest..

What did Time teach you recently?

What would you do differently if you learned that you had 3 months left to live?

Oh really!    

Why wait?

“Life, as it is called, is for most of us one long postponement.”

 
Henry Miller

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When I can drive a car…

When I get my degree…

When I find Mister Right or Miss Perfect…

When I have kids…

When I have a better job or salary…

When the kids leave home…

When I retire…

When… fill your own excuse here ______________________

When… when…when will you stop making excusessss?

“My Mama always said you’ve got to put the past behind you before you can move on.”

From the movie Forrest Gump

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“Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated.”

Confucius

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We are so good at making  life complicated. Don’t you find it amazing that we can send people on the moon and bring them back and yet,  so many of us have a hard dealing with their  day to day lives?

“Time is at once the most valuable and the most perishable of all our possessions.”

John Randolph

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If this is true, why do we still waste so much of it in so many ways?

 

“I think I’ve discovered the secret of life; you just hang around until you get used to it.” 

Charles Schulz

American cartoonist ( Creator of Peanuts)

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“When you argue with reality, you lose, but only one hundred percent of the time.”

Byron Katie

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When will you start taking yourself seriously. You know when you need a break. You know when you need a rest. You know what to get worked up about and what to get rid of. And you know when it’s time to take care of yourself, for yourself. To do something that makes you stronger, faster, more complete. Because you know it’s never too late to have a life. And never too late to change one.”

Text from an advertisement from the Nike company

Have a great Labor Day weekend!

“The future will depend on what we do in the present”

Mahatma Gandhi

(1869-1948)

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We all know this, it is so simple to understand when we read it. However, the challenge is not only to read it and understand it, the real challenge is to practice what we understand so well.

Yes, practice it day in day out, especially when you have distractions, a bad day or a good day.

Whatever is your dream, your project, your goal, pursue it relentlessly without wasting time.

You need a burning desire to keep you absorbed and focused, even when you have so many responsibilities and distractions.

Will you?

“The trouble with life is that there are so many beautiful women and so little time.” 

John Barrymore

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 With 203 countries ( Sovereign states) to visit,

With thousands of cities to discover,

 With 6,8 billion people living on this planet,

With more than 3 000 000 wine bottles to taste,

With millions of books to read,

With thousands of movies to watch,

With so many skills to learn,

With so many things to experience,

With so many people in need or living in poverty,

I could go on and on…

And  a potential of only 36525 days to live.

How dare you being bored?

“If you want to know your past, look into your present conditions.”

“If you want to know your future, look into your present ACTIONS.”

Chinese proverb

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Time, like life itself, has no inherent meaning.
We give our own meaning to time as to life.

JLH

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“I can’t go back to yesterday, because I was a different person then.”

 Lewis Carroll

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We cannot change the past, we can learn from the past and we can avoid repeating the same mistakes too many times over.

Someone will say;  “This is so obvious!”

Yes it is!

Why do so many of us let our lives be governed by our personal history if we can’t go back to yerterday?

Does adult life have to be full of boredom and compromise?

No, the reason we feel this way sometimes is because we live according to other people’s expectations. We forget ourselves when we try to match society’s standards of what is right, what is success, what we should be doing…instead of remembering our childhood dreams and fantasies.

But when we make a conscious effort to focus on some of our dreams and spend less time living according to our society’s standards, I believe we can drastically improve our quality of life.

It is however a conscious choice and a daily discipline to live this way.

“Any idiot can face a crisis – it’s day to day living that wears you out.”

Anton Chekhov

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There is a lot of truth in this quote! Sometimes, we are at our personal best when we are in the middle of a crisis. Somehow, we find the energy and the courage to fight when everything seems to be hopeless. On the other hand, the routine of the day to day can sometimes drain more energy from us than a big crisis.

Why would this be?   It seems to me that our focus is better and that we are less distracted when times are hard than when times are easy.

What do you think?

See all we have in life is time. From the moment of our first breath, the clock started ticking. The sands of time started to fall down the hourglass and the fuse of our life started to burn down.

Until I value myself, I won’t value my time……..

Unknown author

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“Life is a one-way street, and we are not coming back.”

Anon

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Many of us spend and waste a lot of time thinking that things will be better WHEN we lose weight, get promoted, move into a nicer place, make more money, get married, have children, get out of debt, have more free time, get the kids out of the house, retire, recover from a specific injury, illness, or whatever else it is we think needs to change in order for us to be happy.

Life is not “WHEN” ; it is TODAY.

Stephen Lafond

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