36525 days to live

There is no cure for birth and death , save to enjoy the interval.

George Santayana

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Did you ask to be born?

Will you ask to die?

I doubt it.

In between, we have to make the best of life with the talent we posess and the time that is given to us.

It is so simple. I wonder why some of us make it so complicated.

Do you know why?

Are you one of those who have a tendency to complicate things?

Some of us live under the influence of alcohol.

The influence is good as long as we are under the influence. The next morning, the influence can be quite different.

Some of us live under the influence of shopping, and the influence is good until as we receive the credit card monthly statement…

Some of us live under the influence of gambling, and the influence is good until as we realize that the house always wins against most of us.

Some of us live under the influence of buying expensive toys to impress others who don’t care at all. This influence is gone when we realize that we become a slave of this habit.

Some of us are under the influence of a new religion, and the influence seems to disappear when that special God of ours doesn’t answer our requests.

Some of us indulge in sexual escapism, and the influence is gone when the temporary thrill is over.

Some of us will study philosophy and believe that they have found the Way, only to wake up later and realize that their particular philosophy can fail them.

Some of us will swear by the world of reason and science, only to discover the actual limitations of our understanding. At least at this point of our evolution.

Some of us will invest in the joy of parenthood only to realize later that our kids will be entitled to their own lives.

Some of us will want to earn a lot of money until they realize that money can’t buy love.

And while most of us live under one kind of influence or another, Time goes by.

Under what kind of influence are you living ?

Is this the kind of influence that you enjoy?

It’s up to you!

We have control over our choices, but we don’ t have any control over the consequences of our choices.

What this means is that we don’t always know how things will turn out.

What it means is that we can’t always predict how people will respond to our decisions.

That is why we should be aware of our choices as much as possible if we want to improve our quality of life.

Sometimes our decisions can result in big mistakes that will be costly in time.

From the moment that we know clearly what we want, it becomes easier to make the best possible choices for ourselves. These decisions are unique for each one of us.

Do you ever think of the big difference between your choices and the consequences of your choices?

“Life is just one damned thing after another”

Frank Ward O’Malley (1875-1932)
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It’s true for most of us, at least until we choose to do OUR own damned thing.
I suppose that we feel like this when we lose the balance between how much time and effort we invest for others compared to the time we invest for ourselves.

When we spend a lot of time doing OUR own thing, others may think or say that we are selfish, however, when we invest a lot of time for others, ( I’m thinking of mothers with young children or when we are taking care of family member in need) it can lead us to becoming frustrated or irritable.

Our challenge is to find the right amount of time between what we do for ourselves and what we do for others.

Why is it so important to think of ourselves before we think of others?

The answer is; How can we give to others what we don’t have?

How can you give money if you don’t have enough for your own needs?

How can you give time when you don’t even have time for yourself?

How can you share your knowledge when you are ignorant?

It seems to me that the most generous people of today who are able to give back used to be the people who were thinking of themselves not long ago.

An example? Bill Gates with his philantropy and his Foundation. One of the richest man in the world is becoming one of the most generous in his lifetime.

Do you feel that you invest enough time for others?

Do you feel that you invest enough time for yourself?

Do you ever struggle with these questions?

“The road to hell is paved with good intentions”

Proverb

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This is one of my favorite proverbs because it summarizes so well all the excuses
that we create to justify our inadequacies in so many areas of our lives.

The time and the energy that we often spend to make up these excuses could be invested in doing what must be done.

Life seems to tell us ” Whatever responsability that you try to avoid, I’ll figure out a way for you not to escape it”

Yes, but it’s not my fault…

I meant to do it, but then…

I was very ill, so I couldn’t …

If I had more money…

If I were younger…

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Do I really have to keep on writing?

Are you on the road to hell with YOUR “good intentions”?

“The fault is NOT in the stars, but in ourselves.”

Shakespeare

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How many times do we blame others for what happens or what doesn’t happen to us?

When we point our finger at someone, did you ever notice that at least three of them are coming back towards us?

Confucius used to say; “Don’t complain about the snow on your neighbour’s roof when your own doorstep is unclean”

When you complain about something, 80% of people don’t care about your complaining and some of the last 20% are happy about your misery. Why? Because the first 80% are too preoccupied with their own lives. The remaining 20% are simply envious of you and that makes them secretly happy when something bad happens to you.

What was the question again? Oh yes, Who’s fault is it? Sorry folks, but it’s almost always your fault.

And what if wasn’t ? Well, it’s your responsibility.

“As a rule, men worry more about what they can’t see than about what they can.”

Julius Caesar

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Why do we worry so much?

What do we get out of it?

What’s in it for us?

It is true that we worry more about the unseen and the unknown.

Many people who have written or spoken about worry have told the statistics story. The earliest source that we could find of the story and most probable author was Thomas S. Kepler. He wrote about a woman who realized fears were ruining her life. She began to keep track of what was worrying her and she found:

40% of the things she worried about were about things that would never happen.

30% of the things she worried about were about things that had already happened, water under the bridge.

12% of the things she worried about were about others’ opinion. When she thought about it, she realized that criticisms are often made by those that are jealous or insecure; therefore unjust criticism is a disguised compliment.

10% of the things she worried about were needless health worries, which made her health worse as she worried.

8% of the things she worried about were “legitimate,” since life has some real problems to meet.

If you consider the above as probable statistics, it would seem that only 8% of the things that you worry about are worth the worry. Next time you are worried about something, perform a check to see if the worry is in a category other then the 8% category and if it is, perhaps logic will help free you from the worry.

Will This Matter a Year from Now?

How much quality time do I spend worrying?

Do you ever find yourself saying:

When I’m older, I’ll do this…

Or when it’s time or when I have a chance…

When I finish school, I’ll be able to…

When I have more money…

When I get married, I’ll be …

When the house is paid, we’ll go …

When the kids leave the house, we’ll move…

When I retire, I’ll have more time to…

When I’m dying… Oh no not already… AHHHHHHH…

We should learn to enjoy the road while we are travelling, because if we put all our hopes on the destination, we could be disappointed.

Most of the time, the anticipation is more exciting than the actual outcome.

For years, I wanted to be older, but NOT ANYMORE.

What about you?

The real question for me is : Is there a life BEFORE death ?

When they asked  Henry David Thoreau his opinion on the afterlife, he answered to them: One Life at the time.

Sometimes , it seems to me that some of the people who worry the most about the afterlife are often the ones who don’t know what to do with this one.

Why should we worry about the unknown, why should we worry about something over which we seem to have very little control?

I hear many people talking about faith and yet, at the same time worrying constantly, how can they worry and have faith at the same time? Isn’t worrying the opposite of faith?

Do you spend too much of your time worrying about things over which you have no control?

Does this make any sense to you?

Only when your consciousness is totally focused on the moment you are in can you receive whatever gift, lesson, or delight that the moment has to offer.

Barbara de Angelis

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It seems to me that we are stubborn students of life.

Life seems to tell us; here is a situation you need to face for your own developpement, and yet, most of the time, we will try to avoid the lesson. Why? Because it’s too damned hard! The funny thing about this is; the lesson we try to avoid seems to come back to us in many unexpected ways. Somehow, we can’t escape it.

When we focus on the moment and accept to face what we have to, it is difficult, but it is one of the best way to grow.

What does this post have to do with time?

The sooner we understand this concept and that we put it in practice, the more time we will save to do other activities that we really enjoy. Have a nice day.

Most people I know prefer to avoid the subject of their own mortality. I know , it’s not the most exciting subject, but I think it’s a mistake not to look at death straight in the face for what it really is. Why? Because if we would dare to look at death , most of us would change a lot of things that we are currently procrastinating about.

We have seen this happen many times: when someone gets diagnosed with an incurable disease, when they learn how much time they have left to live , they change a lot of things in their life.

Some of the people who went through this extreme experience said that it was the most intense, fulfilling genuine experience they ever had.

My question to you is: Why wait until you have no time left before making significant changes in your life?

“Procrastination,the presence of mere intention, is the bane of humane existence.”

Unknown author

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How many times in our lives did we say; we should be doing this or we should be doing that, and then nothing happens.

Why?

Is it a lack of determination?

Is it a lack of desire?

Is it a lack of persistence?

It could be, but what if it was something else?

What if it was because we think that we have all the time in the world? Do we really have so much time?

I’ll let you answer these questions for yourself. Have a great week.

“Men talk of killing time, while time quietly kills them”

Dion Bousicault ( 1820-1890)

Irish-born actor & dramatist

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How could anyone in their right mind want to kill time? To want to kill time, in my opinion, is a confession of imbecility because time is what life is made of. Sometimes, we are at work thinking of what we could do on the weekend. However, when the weekend comes, do you ever find yourself doing nothing? So you wasted productive time at work because you were daydreaming, and now you are wasting free time because you did not plan in advance. You are caught off guard at the last minute.

I have a  personal example that happened to my wife and I a few times. We have 3 young children who still need a babysitter when we go out. Sometimes, we had the chance to find a babysitter at the last minute. This was great, but since we had only about 60 to 90 minutes of free time together, our options were limited. By the time we agreed on what we both wanted to do, 20 to 30 minutes had already gone by.

So I asked myself; how can I avoid this kind of situation when our time is so limited and so precious?

Solution: I made a list of dozens of activities that require very little time and that are enjoyable. Since then, we can use these precious minutes in a smarter way.

Exception: Sometimes I choose to relax because I want to, and in this case, it’s not a waste of time.

When we know exactly what we want and what we like, it’s easier to use our time in a smarter way.

Do you often find yourself “killing” precious time ?

Through my efforts, I gain the serenity to accept the things I cannot change;
the courage to change the things I can;
and the wisdom to know the difference.

To live one day at a time;
Enjoy one moment at a time;
Accept the hardships as natural balance;
Taking this beautiful world as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting in the balance;
That I may be able to see myself as happy in this life.

(Many authors have worked on this one, I don’t know who to give the credit to)

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This is so much easier said than done, but I’ll keep on trying until…

I could try to comment this text over and over again, but the real challenge is to live by it when we are confronted with daily frustrations.

“The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation”

Henry David Thoreau

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If this is how you feel, there is still a chance to change it. It’s up to you.

Will you?

We must use time as a tool, not as a couch.

John Fitzgerald Kennedy (1917-63)

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If If someone is watching a reality show about dancing on TV, aren’t they using time as a couch?  If someone is taking some dancing lessons with a friend or partner, aren’t they using time as a tool?

If someone is watching a reality show about singing, aren’t they using time as a couch? If someone is taking singing lessons, entering a karaoke contest or joining a choir, aren’t they using time as a tool?

If someone is watching hockey or golf on TV, aren’t they using time as a couch? If someone is playing hockey or golf with friends, aren’t they using time as a tool?  Is your satisfaction in the watching or in the doing?Are you a spectator or an actor?

Which one will make grow you as an individual?

“I don’t know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody.”

— Bill Cosby, Comedian

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It’s the same concept with time; just like it’s impossible to please everybody, it’s impossible to do everything with the time that is given to us.

So many things and so many people are competing for our attention, this why it is so crucial to choose what are the most important for us in terms of  family time, accomplishments, friendship, work , personal time and so on.

Will you take some time today to choose what are your Top 5 or Top 10 most important projects?

Apparently, Socrates never wrote anything , the knowledge of the man, his life, and his philosophy are based on writings by his students, one of which was Plato who was amongst the most popular. Plato himself was the teacher of Aristotle, and  Aristotle later on became the teacher of Alexander the Great.

We can see how an original thinker (Socrates) had influence on the poet & dreamer (Plato) who in turn had influence on the man of Logic (Aristotle) who finally influenced the man of action (Alexander the Great). The teachings of Socrates still resonate with us directly and indirectly 24 centuries later.

We can see with the previous succession of great people the importance of teaching.

Some of the greatest teachers often work in relative obscurity, it is their own personal passion that helps to shape some of the greatest individuals of the future.

Could you be one of them?

Could Taylor Mali be one of them?

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I  really like this guy ( Taylor Mali). Check it out.

“Life is a series of near misses. But a lot of what we ascribe to luck is not luck at all. It’s seizing the day and accepting responsibility for your future.”

Howard Schultz

American entrepreneur, Chairman of Starbucks.

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In other words, how many times do we miss some incredible opportunities in life because we are so focused on ourselves? Take responsibility for what you want , what you need, what you dream about. Create your own opportunities by getting out of your comfort zone; meeting new people, going to new places, learning new skills and exploring unfamiliar territories.

When was the last time you took a risk?

When was the last time you did something you were afraid of?

Beware complexifiers & complicators. Truly, “smart people” …simplify things.

TomPeters

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What you are about to read applies to most of us¸

Living isn’t complicated, feeding yourself  isn’t complicated, finding a roof over your head isn’t complicated, learning new skills isn’t complicated, making new friends isn’t complicated, It’s actually quite easy.

If what I’m writing is valid, Why do so many of us have the tendency to complicate very simple puzzle and transform them into very difficult problems to solve? Are we some kind of maso-psycho-slow-destructive-kamikaze unto ourselves?

When you meet with someone who tells you that something is very complicated,  First BEWARE, then RELAX because it’s probably not.

“No matter how small and unimportant what we are doing may seem, if we do it well, it may become the step that will lead us to better things.”

Channing Pollock

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This is encouraging and inspiring ! Why ? Because there is always room for improvement

Don’t you think so?

 I really enjoyed this clip and I’m sharing it with you.

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It is not enough to be industrious; so are the ants. What are you industrious about?

Henry David Thoreau

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Some people are so busy.Really? Busy doing what exactly ? Do you really want to do what you do everyday ?

If you had 10 million dollars, would you keep doing what you are doing now?

Do you enjoy what you do so much that you would gladly to do it for free?

What is YOUR answer ?

Preparation is essential, but even more essential is the willingness to let go of a plan in a flash and off in a revised direction.

Tom Peters  ( perhaps influenced by John Boyd United States Air Force fighter pilot and military strategist)

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If you want to use your time in the most productive way, it is important to plan and prepare, then start and finish.But you have to keep your eyes and your options open to new opportunities when they arise. Your biggest opportunity could turn out to be life changing and life enhancing.

How do you make sure to keep your eyes open so that opportunities don’t pass you by?

One of the things that stands between us and our quality of life, is the underlying fear of death. From the moment we don’t fear death anymore, we don’t fear life either. When we get rid of the fear of dying, we get rid of a lot of others fears with it.

The moment that we become almost fearless, we can enjoy life to its fullest because of our willingness to take risks.

Isn’t it ironic that people who are ready to take on more risk are often the ones who are reaping the rewards? And even when they don’t get the big prize, they are having fun enjoying what they love the most, and that in itself is the reward; the satisfaction of a job well done.

My hope is that some young people understand this concept as early as possible. So much time and frustration could be avoided.

Yes but what if I fail? Try again.

And what if I fail again? Try again , and again, and again.

And what if my friends laugh at me? Ask yourself ; what risk are my so-called friends taking?

Did you take the time to identify YOUR fears of failure?

What are you ready to lose in order to gain something bigger or better?

“Life is what happens to you while your busy making other plans”

John Lennon (1940-80) British rock musician

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We often say things like, “when I’m older, I’ll do this; if I had more time, I would start this project; when my children are grown up, I’ ll have more time to take  care of myself.” If, If, If, when, when, when…are just excuses to test our determination.

When we really care about someone, we do what we must do.

When we really care about something, we become very creative in order to get what we want.

What we can be, we must become, ultimately, it is one of the best ways to be at peace with ourselves.

Stop waiting and Start acting NOW.

What are you waiting for?

In India, Buddhist aspirants used to visit burning grounds and watch the corpses of those whose families couldn’t afford a cremation rot away. They did this to terrify the GREED and POSSESSIVENESS out of themselves. After that, they changed their perspective about life, death and what was the most essential things in their lives.

As of 5 April 2010, the human population of the world is estimated by the United States Census Bureau to be 6,812,400,000.

It is estimated that 156 000 people on this planet are dying everyday. One day it will be our turn.

I don’t care how rich you are, I don’t care how smart you are, I don’t care how proud you are, because, ultimately, your only real earthly possession is : TODAY.

Can you always tell the difference between your needs and your wants?

When we become too possessive, doesn’t it remind you of little kids who refuse to share their toys?

“The aim of life is to live, and to live means to be aware,

 joyously, drunkenly, serenely, divinely aware.”

Henry Miller (1891-1980) US novelist

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When I am completely aware and living in the NOW, it is easier for me to accept the things as they really are and not as I want them to be. It’s when I’m preoccupied with the potential problems of the future that I lose most of my awareness. This is why it is so important for us to put things in perspective, especially a long-term perspective. If I ask myself questions like the following ones;

What will I think of this particular problem in 1, 5 or 10 years?

How will I feel about this frustration a week from now?

Why am I so annoyed with this person?

How can I keep my calm when I’m stuck in a traffic jam?

Who cares if this stranger is insulting me?

… you can continue with your own questions here.

When we think of it, it is often these petty annoyances that disturb us the most.

After we take the time to answer these questions with a long term perspective in mind, we can start to live in the NOW again, and that improves our quality of life. Awaress is in the NOW .

Why does it take so much time to so many of us to understand this simple reality?

Or if we understand it, why is it so difficult to practice in our own lives?

“Procrastination is the thief of time.”

Edward Young (1683-1765) British poet

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A lot of people are afraid to lose their health.

In most cases, we can and will regain our health.

A lot of people are afraid to lose their friends.

We can always make new friends.

A lot of people are afraid to lose their money.

But we can always earn more money.

Very few people are conscious of the time they are wasting

Procrastination robs us of our time, life is short.

In which area of your life are you procrastinating?

Why ?

“Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils”           

Hector Berlioz (1803-1869) French composer

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Time is a great teacher when we dare to make mistakes.

Time is a greater and more effective teacher when we accept to learn from our mistakes.

Time is the greatest and wisest teacher when we learn from the mistakes of others and avoid to make them ourselves.

Time will eventually kill all of us, and since we don’t know when, one of the most important lessons Time can teach us is:  To live each day like if it was our last .

What would you do differently if you learned that you had 100 days left to live?

If you can find YOUR right answer to this question,  Why wait ?