April 2010


There is no cure for birth and death , save to enjoy the interval.

George Santayana

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Did you ask to be born?

Will you ask to die?

I doubt it.

In between, we have to make the best of life with the talent we posess and the time that is given to us.

It is so simple. I wonder why some of us make it so complicated.

Do you know why?

Are you one of those who have a tendency to complicate things?

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Some of us live under the influence of alcohol.

The influence is good as long as we are under the influence. The next morning, the influence can be quite different.

Some of us live under the influence of shopping, and the influence is good until as we receive the credit card monthly statement…

Some of us live under the influence of gambling, and the influence is good until as we realize that the house always wins against most of us.

Some of us live under the influence of buying expensive toys to impress others who don’t care at all. This influence is gone when we realize that we become a slave of this habit.

Some of us are under the influence of a new religion, and the influence seems to disappear when that special God of ours doesn’t answer our requests.

Some of us indulge in sexual escapism, and the influence is gone when the temporary thrill is over.

Some of us will study philosophy and believe that they have found the Way, only to wake up later and realize that their particular philosophy can fail them.

Some of us will swear by the world of reason and science, only to discover the actual limitations of our understanding. At least at this point of our evolution.

Some of us will invest in the joy of parenthood only to realize later that our kids will be entitled to their own lives.

Some of us will want to earn a lot of money until they realize that money can’t buy love.

And while most of us live under one kind of influence or another, Time goes by.

Under what kind of influence are you living ?

Is this the kind of influence that you enjoy?

It’s up to you!

 

We have control over our choices, but we don’ t have any control over the consequences of our choices.

What this means is that we don’t always know how things will turn out.

What it means is that we can’t always predict how people will respond to our decisions.

That is why we should be aware of our choices as much as possible if we want to improve our quality of life.

Sometimes our decisions can result in big mistakes that will be costly in time.

From the moment that we know clearly what we want, it becomes easier to make the best possible choices for ourselves. These decisions are unique for each one of us.

Do you ever think of the big difference between your choices and the consequences of your choices?

“Life is just one damned thing after another”

Frank Ward O’Malley (1875-1932)
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It’s true for most of us, at least until we choose to do OUR own damned thing.
I suppose that we feel like this when we lose the balance between how much time and effort we invest for others compared to the time we invest for ourselves.

When we spend a lot of time doing OUR own thing, others may think or say that we are selfish, however, when we invest a lot of time for others, ( I’m thinking of mothers with young children or when we are taking care of family member in need) it can lead us to becoming frustrated or irritable.

Our challenge is to find the right amount of time between what we do for ourselves and what we do for others.

Why is it so important to think of ourselves before we think of others?

The answer is; How can we give to others what we don’t have?

How can you give money if you don’t have enough for your own needs?

How can you give time when you don’t even have time for yourself?

How can you share your knowledge when you are ignorant?

It seems to me that the most generous people of today who are able to give back used to be the people who were thinking of themselves not long ago.

An example? Bill Gates with his philantropy and his Foundation. One of the richest man in the world is becoming one of the most generous in his lifetime.

Do you feel that you invest enough time for others?

Do you feel that you invest enough time for yourself?

Do you ever struggle with these questions?

“The road to hell is paved with good intentions”

Proverb

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This is one of my favorite proverbs because it summarizes so well all the excuses
that we create to justify our inadequacies in so many areas of our lives.

The time and the energy that we often spend to make up these excuses could be invested in doing what must be done.

Life seems to tell us ” Whatever responsability that you try to avoid, I’ll figure out a way for you not to escape it”

Yes, but it’s not my fault…

I meant to do it, but then…

I was very ill, so I couldn’t …

If I had more money…

If I were younger…

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Do I really have to keep on writing?

Are you on the road to hell with YOUR “good intentions”?

“The fault is NOT in the stars, but in ourselves.”

Shakespeare

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How many times do we blame others for what happens or what doesn’t happen to us?

When we point our finger at someone, did you ever notice that at least three of them are coming back towards us?

Confucius used to say; “Don’t complain about the snow on your neighbour’s roof when your own doorstep is unclean”

When you complain about something, 80% of people don’t care about your complaining and some of the last 20% are happy about your misery. Why? Because the first 80% are too preoccupied with their own lives. The remaining 20% are simply envious of you and that makes them secretly happy when something bad happens to you.

What was the question again? Oh yes, Who’s fault is it? Sorry folks, but it’s almost always your fault.

And what if wasn’t ? Well, it’s your responsibility.

“As a rule, men worry more about what they can’t see than about what they can.”

Julius Caesar

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Why do we worry so much?

What do we get out of it?

What’s in it for us?

It is true that we worry more about the unseen and the unknown.

Many people who have written or spoken about worry have told the statistics story. The earliest source that we could find of the story and most probable author was Thomas S. Kepler. He wrote about a woman who realized fears were ruining her life. She began to keep track of what was worrying her and she found:

40% of the things she worried about were about things that would never happen.

30% of the things she worried about were about things that had already happened, water under the bridge.

12% of the things she worried about were about others’ opinion. When she thought about it, she realized that criticisms are often made by those that are jealous or insecure; therefore unjust criticism is a disguised compliment.

10% of the things she worried about were needless health worries, which made her health worse as she worried.

8% of the things she worried about were “legitimate,” since life has some real problems to meet.

If you consider the above as probable statistics, it would seem that only 8% of the things that you worry about are worth the worry. Next time you are worried about something, perform a check to see if the worry is in a category other then the 8% category and if it is, perhaps logic will help free you from the worry.

Will This Matter a Year from Now?

How much quality time do I spend worrying?

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